Since last we met, I've managed to get the taxes in, to not catch strep from my husband (who was very sweet about being banished to the couch, &, really, it was only one night), to get my daughter's party invitations out the door (she wanted Barbie, I wanted Fairy Tea Party, we compromised on Princess, sigh.), & maybe most importantly, I managed to perform a reducing exercise upon the Giant Elephant Doorstop.
I got lots of helpful comments about the whole giant immovable zillion-pound beanbag situation, & I have to say that I think that the sand/polyfill suggestion that came in from a few different people is a great one...if you don't mind that your doorstop is the size of a tiny little car, like those ones they have in France that only come up to my waist. Plus, the seams were visibly weakening after only a couple days' worth of mistreatment by my kids, & I have no desire to chase a zillion pounds of beans (or several pounds of sand, even) around the house with my omop (much as I love it).
So I took the thing completely apart except for the handle & took 1/2" off of each piece, then sewed it back together with the recommended 1/2" seam allowance. It worked beautifully except my cutting must have been a little funky because the top didn't fit back in as well as I would have liked, but I don't really care too much because look at this:
It took both of these boxes, full to overflowing, to not-really-fill the original version of the doorstop. Shrinking the pattern by 1/2" all around cut the amount in half, practically (you can see that I scooped a few handfuls out of the second box, but in half has better dramatic impact). My husband says that this is an excellent example of the difference, or relationship, or something, between area & volume; I say that it means I don't have to strap on a back brace before propping a door open.
Much, much better. First of all, it's much more pleasingly plump. Also, you can actually see some chair around it, & I don't hear its constituent threads straining quite as loudly when I pick it up. (Speaking of: the pattern recommends slip-stitching it closed after filling, but since you're stitching one of the bottom load-bearing seams, I would (& did) go with a good sturdy whip-stitch instead.)
In this action shot, you can see that it now looks comfortably doorstop sized & might not be quite so scary to the local cats. On the down side, it's no longer big enough to hide the fact that I should seriously consider one of those metal scuff plates for my front door.